The Past is the Past

As I lay awake staring at the ceiling above me.. Many thoughts race through my head. Visions of my past flash before my eyes. I know you're supposed to be able to move forward from the past and not worry about it, but my past has so much to it that I wish I could go back and redo it.. When I dream I dream of past events. I remember times that I had that I'll never get back. I don't regret one single thing I did, but sometimes I wish I could go back and relive moments. I wish I could go back and relive New Years of 2012 which was the last time I saw my cousin alive. The last time she slept over at my house. The last time she hugged me and said "I love you loser." It's the little things I miss.. I wish I could go back to my 19th birthday, the last birthday I'd ever spend with my poppy. The last conversation we ever had. The last hug and kiss I got from him. The last time I heard him laugh. The last time I heard his voice. There are so many moments I wish I could go back and relive. And there are many things I wish I did and wish I said. Who knows maybe things would be different now?